The 5 Minute Career Coach

Helping Career Changers Around The World

August 2012

What To Do When Life Happens

Broken Pencil

Life happens. That’s guaranteed.

Setbacks, disappointments, failure – most people are in fear of them and hate it when these things happen. They regard them as a catastrophe; not only that, they succumb to despondency and become discouraged. Sometimes they even believe that this situation will last forever and that nothing will ever change.

Here is a different view.

The worst that can happen to you is not to experience setbacks and disappointments. Why? Because it’s only through challenges that we learn and grow, develop insights, wisdom and inner resilience.

It’s important that we stop struggling and resisting what cannot be changed, for example by wishing this hadn’t happened; complaining that it’s not fair, that we did nothing wrong and wondering why we should be ‘punished’? None of it is productive. Not only that but it also reinforces a victim mentality.

We only begin to empower ourselves when we give up that false belief.

What does it look like when we’re empowered?

Top of the list is that we no longer regard ourselves as helpless victims, we stop blaming others or even life itself.

How do you stop believing yourself to be a victim? You stop believing yourself to be a victim when you begin to see that there are options you didn’t realise you had. You stop believing yourself to be a victim when you realise you can choose – that you can choose to take control of your life. That simple choice will transform your life and the possibilities that present themselves.

The next step is to figure out what really matters to you.

What might your purpose be? What would ignite your passion? What kind of work and what kind of life do you really want?

Once you no longer feel like a victim, you will be able to see options and possibilities that you didn’t notice before, when you were in the grip of helplessness.

When you begin to take control of your life, how do you keep positive?

There are two things that make a whole lot of difference – friends and doing things to nurture yourself that give you pleasure.
Ask yourself:

“Who are my closest friends, the ones I can turn to?” Then contact them and tell them what’s going on in your life. Reaching out encourages closeness.

What do you do that gives you pleasure? What can you do to re-charge your batteries? It needn’t cost anything – or much: meeting a friend for a coffee, a walk in the park, treating yourself to a bubble bath.

Sue Plum tree
Push away at your comfort zones, experiment, try out new things – some you will like, some you won’t – it’s all information.

One thing is certain: Life happens at the edge of your comfort zone. It is down to you to push at the boundaries to make life’s ‘happenings’ into something positive.

Read more about Sue and her work here

Something of Interest

debbie paul
  • Would you like be more confident?
  • Are negative beliefs holding you back?
  • Change limiting beliefs – transform your life.
  • Learn to be confident in any situation
  • Simply by listening you gain results

Debbie Williams is an experienced NLP trainer and hypnotherapist who has trained and worked with Paul McKenna. She has developed a wide range of CDs and mp3 downloads to help her clients manage a range of challenges in their lives.

I met Debbie at one of Joanna Martin’s events. She is a wonderfully warm hearted person who is totally committed to her clients, so I am delighted to recommend her hypnotherapy CDs to you.

If you think your confidence could do with a boost, just click here to find out more about her Ultimate Confidence CD.

Thought for the Day

The tragedy of life is
not so much what men suffer,

but rather what they miss.

~Thomas Carlyle~

So don’t focus on what is going wrong. Look instead for the half-hidden opportunities that are all around.

Cherry Recommends

Shift Happens

Two caterpillars were sitting on a branch when a butterfly flew past overhead. One caterpillar turned to the other and said ‘You’ll never catch me up in one of those things.’

Like it or not, life does happen, the unexpected will be thrown at you and what matters most is how you choose to respond to the ‘stuff’ that happens.

In the introduction, Robert says ‘Some people ‘go’ through life; others ‘grow’ through life.’

Which kind of person will you be?

The book contains 55 short chapters so it is easy to dip into when you need a boost. Each one is designed to inspire and encourage you, to help you to stop struggling, break away from fear and discover how you can find true happiness. Happiness is not something to be found out there, but rather something to discover within yourself if only you know where and how to look.

This book will show you the where and how.

With best wishes for your career change success

About the author

Amy Thomas

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